Words
Oh ... You just made my night. It's odd really. After weeks of tomultuous HotWired bullshit I finally get the chance to talk to my coworkers ... and all night I'm thinking of you. Little flashes of you on my roof and walking and at your house when you didn't turn away. And more. Dream-like images from late at night. Soft. Almost dreams, but real. I remember every word, every look. And now it's three am, I'm here at work, everyone is sleeping or hacking, I'm a little stoned and I can't sleep. I'm here in the glow of my monitor, wishing I was with you. Odd. I have that feeling again. That feeling like everything is changing. I felt that way five months ago when I got the job and was set to move to San Francisco. And I have it now. It's like you feel yourself moving in a direction - a current - gravity - and you know you can't fight it. So you just feel the current take you. And you wait. Tomorrow, Monday, is the big meeting. Wednesday is my meeting with Chip. My world could get a whole lot better or a whole lot worse in the next few days. And then there's you. I've been here before - The Day After. I've been broken up with on this day and I've been the one to do the breaking. You could tell me you never want to see me again. I could lose you forever. Tonight I really wanted to see your homepage, but it was down. And yesterday my monitor broke on my home computer when I really wanted to log on and see if you'd emailed. I do believe in omens. But I also believe in you. And if you still like me after this late night babble, we may be able to do this after all. I wish I was with you tonight.
-- Derek |