Illustration of Derek Powazek by Adam Ellis

All of This Has a Perfectly Reasonable Explanation, Part 3

Continued from yesterday.

I’m almost to the explanation now.

Next thing I know, it’s 6am and Heather is poking me to get moving. We’ve gotta leave the house in an hour. Then suddenly it’s 6:30 and we’ve got a half hour. I stumble into the shower and try to wake up.

I cram the last few things into my suitcase, shove my laptop in my backpack, and hurry out the door with Heather. We’ve only got a couple hours to make the 20 minute drive to the airport. (See, this is how messed up air travel is. The drive to the airport takes about a one-sixth of the time you have to budget just to get on the plane.)

Heather drove and I slouched in the passenger seat sucking on a latte she’d kindly picked up for me. Just as we’re arriving at the airport parking lot, I reach into my backpack and realize that I’ve forgotten my sunglasses. We’re going to Hawaii and I have no sunglasses.

In my defense, they are prescription sunglasses, and I am pretty blind without them. But, then again, I’m the guy who remembered to install a new OS and forgot his glasses, so I’m clearly not operating on all cylinders here.

Trying to make me feel better, Heather says, “We’ll figure something out when we get there.”

And that’s when a mental image hits me in a blinding flash. It’s me, in Hawaii, wearing those tinted visors over my glasses like a retiree. Two pairs of glasses at once.

“No,” I said. “I’m going back for my sunglasses.”

Concluding Tomorrow…

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Hi, I’m Derek. I used to make websites. Now I grow flowers and know things. I’m mostly harmless. More.